Putting a child up for adoption is never easy. Very few mothers can emotionally remove themselves entirely from the situation. As such, your adoption agent will suggest that you seek counseling and emotional/psychiatric therapy during and after the birth of the baby and after the baby goes home with the adoptive parent(s). Here is why counseling and therapy are so important to the adoption process.
Bonds Form Almost Instantly Between Mother and Child
There is a reason why so many "bonding" hormones begin to surge through your body towards the end of the pregnancy, during birth, and after the delivery. These hormones help you make a connection to the baby even before it comes into the world. Even if you are able to ignore these motherly feelings, the main hormone for bonding, oxytocin, skyrockets after delivery.
This aids the bonding between mother and child so that mothers will immediately pick up and care for the babies without hesitation. When you will not be holding the baby and the baby will leave the hospital with someone else, the hormones are still present, and you will feel an intense loss. As such, you may feel regret, sorrow, loss, and even anger until these hormones subside. Pre-partum counseling teaches you to expect these feelings and how to deal with them, while post-partum counseling addresses what you feel and how to deal with post-partum depression.
Post-Partum Depression Is Unpleasant, at Best
Women who are not giving their babies up for adoption go through post-partum depression. When you have post-partum depression and no baby, the feelings may be even worse. Therapy after the baby goes with the adoptive parents may be necessary for you to regain a sense of self and to feel okay about your decision. It helps to talk about what you are feeling so that you can get through the hormone-induced depression and find comfort and acceptance regarding the adoption.
A Word on Pregnancies Caused by Rape or Incest
Many women who find themselves pregnant via rape or incest are already in a very difficult position. Most of them choose to terminate the pregnancy, but if you are one of the few who choose to carry the baby to term and give it up for adoption, you still need counseling and therapy because of the event that caused the pregnancy. Even if you were not pregnant, your doctor would urge you to seek therapy to address what happened to you. Because you are pregnant, and because you suffered something traumatic, your post-partum depression is very likely to be significantly worse than if you were not a victim of rape or incest.Share